Life is busy. Commuting takes longer, lunch queues are busier and shops are open longer. We glorify busy. I do it myself. If only I had time. Work is manic. I had deadlines. We have all used and heard those excuses, how long will it take me to write this blog? Truthfully 10-15 minutes. How many of my friends have I text this morning? Two. I’m doing ok I think. If you need somebody nobody should ever be too busy. I’ve taken 3 am phone calls. Text people while I’ve been at work just to check in on them. Driven to another county to do a grocery shop for a friend that fell on hard times but was too proud to ask for help. Every week tried to do a random act of kindness.
One of the resolutions I’ve made this year is to continue doing that. Empathy is a great trait. It’s what makes me who I am. But this year I will be more cautious with my time and give it to those that deserve it. Not out of arrogance or self serving but because I need to.
I was chatting to a friend recently on this subject and she said to me ” you’re one of the busiest friends I have but the one I see and hear from most often, why is that?” I know this girl is going through a rough time right now, so I make the effort. I’m not a saint but hate to think of her feeling alone or lonely.
People that don’t make time for you aren’t inherently bad or uncaring, they are just self focused. It’s not a failing on your part to be interesting or vivacious, the way others operate is not a reflection on you. It’s hard not to think someone’s silence or absence is a rejection or reflection of you. It’s not. It’s just how they are. You then of course need to evaluate whether they are worth your time or not. The moment that you feel the need to apologise for wanting their time or taking their time is the moment to back away.
2015 for me is about being productive with my time. Dedicating my efforts towards people I love. Love comes in many forms.
And I will leave you on this note … If you’re Important they will find a way , if not they will find an excuse. Nobody is that busy.
Take time to ask your friends how they are really doing, maybe the ones that are supportive need a shoulder too sometimes. Be a good friend. That’s resolution for 2015 x
Great post! You are right though, people will be thinking of themselves even if your thinking of them instead. Ive learned this the hard way but its hard to change. I’ve tried not to be the one to make the effort first, you’ll gain a lot more time on your hands. But People never change. They will still expect you to get onto them first. Which is awful!!
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