It is a weird world. If you had told me five years ago that I would be penning a blog, let alone uploading images of my face all over the internet I would have laughed. In fact sometimes I look at the pictures I post and don’t recognise myself. Looking back at me is a face I have lived with almost 38 years. It is far from perfect, I don’t have pillowy lips or chiseled cheekbones nor do I have big eyes or a perfect nose. That is OK though you know why? Anything I was majorly unhappy with I have tried to rectify or learned to live with. Self confidence for me as an average looking curvy girl has come from turning down the noise on the stuff I don’t like. I don’t really care what anyone things of my appearance. I love complimenting others on how they look. I find that not everyone is going to like how you look and the internet has produced it’s own demon the Troll. Lately I have been trolled a lot. Often it takes a while for me to cop it, usually someone will make a nasty comment under a picture or by DM. I used to ignore them but lately I am taking a bit more of a stand.
I am a married woman of 37, with friends a job I am learning so much in and overall a pretty good life. A lotto win and dream body would be the hat trick but I am not selfish ya know :). Imagine though I was younger, less self assured and didn’t have a close circle of friends? How would these comments make me feel? To a degree I put myself out there, but I write a regular beauty column and blog so why shouldn’t I?
The trolls are primarily men telling the the following :
I wear too much make up
I look like a prostitute ( this is baffling as in its equivalent to saying I look like a plumber)
I have hairs on my face ( ok I do but eh all women do)
I am attractive but not that attractive
Above are some filtered and unfiltered photos. I wear full make up every day I work in a dynamic glam environment so why should I apologise to fuckwits that can’t comprehend what I do? It’s taken me 30 or so years to accept myself and to be quite honest I’m fucked if I’m waiting on nameless trolls to join the movement.
I’ve worked hard on loving myself and others. The sad thing is that trolling seems to be a hobby online and in person. It’s harder to do it in person to a strong woman though. Much easier to hide behind your keyboard or phone in your moms spare room.
Good luck to the trolls. Giving a voice to assholes since 1999.