Bloggers Blaggers and Bull … a story of me with pictures

The blogger thing has quite frankly got me thinking and if I’m honest doing a bit of soul searching. Firstly I kinda ice skate quite inelegantly around the border of being a blogger, I have my own website and curate my own content , however the reason I initially started a blog was because someone said I should …. then it took off a little. Everyone is lashing out at bloggers now and to be honest I could see it coming with my ears. Last year I wrote two blogs Selfie Acceptance and Are we losing the integrity of blogging ?. One year on and the shit storm I predicted happened. It started with the BullShitCallerOuters page. The biggest eye opener of my life. I didn’t know the half of what was going on. And I’m right in the thick of it in terms of being a blogger although very clearly not an influencer. I am a good advisor though. Of that I can assure you. I don’t ever recommend products because of affiliation to a brand or PR company.

And then the HontheHuns page quickly followed suit gaining traction although it had been around a while. I actually think this page is possibly more centric in its approach. But to be honest I think the time had come for this.

So anyway between them they have been exposing editing , photoshopping and face tuning like it’s going out of fashion. That is theirs to do. Both have cited not wanting drama and reading the comments really opened my eyes. I think the general consensus is that anyone that says anything negative gets blocked. I can see both sides of this. Firstly you have the blogger getting comments about their personal appearance and lives being made by the minute. However if you put yourself out there you have to expect both positive and negative feedback. Sorry that’s a side order of instafame. Expose yourself and you will be exposed. That’s reality. But here’s the line… when you start insulting and dehumanising a person I don’t think that’s fair either. I get that people feel cheated. I understand that people feel duped ,but you cannot call someone horrible names and think it is ok. Unfollow and move along. The photoshopping is fairly obvious. I understand that not everyone knows how to do it but it’s like any advert people aren’t going to want to look bad. I don’t agree with it. It’s not right it’s not fair but you as the consumer has to make a choice. It is in your own interests that you realise content is curated , there’s a reason that there’s a pose called the blogger pose. There a reason that they fawn over certain products and people. The reason is money. Money isn’t a dirty word. It’s a currency we all need. I have made my own mistakes online I’m sure, and we can all get carried along in the hype of some dramatic online carry on. There is however a fine line between saying you don’t like the lipstick someone is wearing and “calling them on out having more lip fillers than Jackie Stallone” .

But MJ think of the childer….. I actually think that the name calling and negative carry on is as damaging to kids as the actual posts are. Everyone needs to clean up their act. Public forms of social media are completely different to What’s App groups where you might slag someone off. By all means as a consumer you have a right to complain but being personal isn’t really ok. It’s teaching the younger generation to become desensitised to this type of behaviour. It’s up to parents to do their best to explain to the younger people that being honest having integrity is far more important than anything, and to show them that they are worth more than a few likes on Instagram.

I’ve had my share of negativity and in fact three years ago I had a dose of therapy. Not retail therapy ( like people might recommend , feeling crap? Buy yourself a lipstick , no. ) but Therapy. Sit on a couch with a psychotherapist and snot into a tissue therapy. Turns out I had a lot of unresolved issues around grief and general neediness ( stems from losing my awesome parents so young) but anyway that’s a whole other blog. Go see a therapist if you can’t cope. They are awesome, and Jean was the second one I tried, the first one was bonkers.

You know what? Your mother didn’t carry you for nine months, go through labour , leaking boobs and a possible year of sleepless nights so you could compare yourself to girls on the internet. Understood? Good. Next..

The next thing is the products debacle. “They are importing it from China and it’s all crap” well now ask yourself this. Did you go into a chemist and test it? Did you check it out and see any reviews that weren’t by the person that made it? Did you make an educated informed choice ? That’s the question people need to ask. You cannot blame people for wanting to make money. You cannot blame people for wanting to earn a living. Make informed decisions. For what it’s worth I love the Sosu Lashes ( some styles but that is a choice) the glue though is horrible and tacky. Her contour pallet is good. Her highlight great. They eyeshadows ? Meh. Buy the earrings on Ali Express. Now we all know. They are allowed to approach companies and ask to collaborate. All they have to say is no. Maybe some need to work on their pitches and gain real interactive following but you don’t ask you don’t get.

Just Jordan launched Luna. *disclaimer I worked with Lisa in BT before ( just in the interests of being open ). She’s lovely and actually would tell you if you needed to fix your hair or if you had loo roll stick to your shoe or whatever. What you see on Snapchat etc is her. Anyway I digress. Her lipglosses are amazing and girly and not over the top in terms of price. Her photos are honestly what she looks like with makeup and yeah that is her actual body. You’d love to hate her but you can’t. She’s business smart and is approaching her blog like a business. She’s not duping anyone. She had a vision and went for it. Fair play Lisa ya legend.

Cherry Sue is like the Hugh Hefner of blogging. She was one of the first and her no frills attitude gives her the edge over a lot of simpering , faux self deprecating bloggers. She gives free advice and good hugs.

Louise O Connell is another lady whose determination and drive has seen her get where she wants to go. She’s a full time Nurse and is working hard to get her blog recognised and is doing a mighty fine job. I knew Lou when she had a bad fringe and a penchant for Blue Satin. She’s not changed much but the hair has.

The Beautiful Truth is my blog spirit animal. Sinead likes the same things I do and is definitely honest and approachable. She’s also a nice person with defined goals.

Katie’s Curvy Closet is another winner for me. I have to include her because she does my brows and is my therapist. She’s witty and body confident and extremely hot. She’s also funny and honest.

For Instaporn and Couple Goals I love The L Word by Laura. She’s hot and fit. She drinks cocktails and is a fierce lover of travel and fashion. She gave me my first protein ball. I love her.

In terms of make up Inspiration give me a slice of Jeanette Cronin. She isn’t afraid of glitter or lashes and is so nice. She can do my face anytime.

For a different approach to Fitness my Pilates Guru Sian Horn ( My Sayso) is a bit of gas. Although she likes vegan mayo so you might want to be cautious … just kidding she’s awesome.

When looking at bloggers ask yourself … are they aspirational or are they just someone you like, if they are neither you know what you have to do.

As I write this I am over six months into my dream job which wouldn’t have happened without GlamityJane. Working in a media and publishing house has always been a #goal of mine. Social Media has made that happen. Obviously it helped that I had a few brain cells and a bit of confidence. That confidence was hard come by though. I’ve had plenty of knocks.

You know when everyone wanted to be Carrie from Sex and the City? I saw the potential in Carrie for sure but I wanted to be Samantha. She for me was far more attractive an option. Ballsy, took care of her own needs and appearance , was a great friend , loyal , honest and was unashamedly herself. When I told people that they would look at me and be baffled. What ? Being a nympho maniac man eater is on your agenda? No. Being a woman confident in herself and her persona is. Everyone focused on the ballbreaking , one night stand loving Singleton. Nobody looked past that. She never allowed anyone to undermine her. Did she use her blonde hair and fierce attitude to get where she wanted ? She did. That is why I loved Samantha. Give me her over simpering “why doesn’t he love me in my tulle skirt pretty shoes that I can’t afford and lambswool cardigan ?” Carrie any day. Pass me a powerful outfit and a bag of sass right now please. Anyway cue 2018 and here I am. Carrie I am not ( thank god ).

Back to the bloggers and influencers. Are they Carrie or are they Samantha ? that’s what you gotta ask yourself.